Zero to some fucks given
Huzzah! Finally we can be free and live our lives!! Repeat….LIVE. OUR. LIVES. Because we are alive assholes and we constantly forget the beauty of that statement while we…wait OMG someone just posted new pics of themselves on their vacation…uhhhh they are always travelling do they not work?!?!? Why are they always laughing at salads in their photos?!?!? What’s so funny about salad?!?!? (See what I did there).
We constantly fall into the rabbit hole of comparisons and people pleasing. Guys, I am a recovering people pleaser. I avoid confrontation and bend over backwards to do what I think will fill the other human with joy. And it’s EXHAUSTING. So lucky me when last week on the podcast Good Life Project, they had on Mark Manson who wrote an incredible article titled, “The Subtle Art of Not Giving a Fuck.” Awesome right? He’s even turned it into a book. Double fist pump in the air!!!
I wanted to write about it because we are bogging ourselves down with garbage worries and trivial musings. “Oh, Bernice, yeah she’s nice.” Nice? NICE?!?!? You guys nice is not a compliment. Stop trying to please people. You know that incredible feeling you have when you are with people who take you as you are and you can do whatever weird shit you want without judgement? How freeing is that? Wouldn’t it be nice to feel that more often? Stop giving so many fucks. We only have so many fucks to go around so stop wasting them!
As Mark puts it, “Because when we give too many fucks, when we choose to give a fuck about everything, then we feel as though we are perpetually entitled to feel comfortable and happy at all times, that’s when life fucks us”. It doesn’t mean being indifferent or not caring, it means caring about the IMPORTANT things in your life and letting the rest melt away. It’s also considered adulting or being mature. TRY IT WEINERS!
Do you have rabies? Give a fuck!
Did Gladys give your outfit a side eye today at the office? Don’t give a fuck! She’s 80 and her name is Gladys!!!
Did the salad man forget raisins in your order? Don’t give a fuck! Stop eating raisin salads you freaks!
Is the person you love most in this world upset with you? Give a fuck!
Is someone you kind of know fabulous on Instagram every day? DON’T GIVE A FUCK!
SEE IT’S FUN NOT GIVING A FUCK ABOUT TRIVIAL MATTERS!
Kick everything unimportant in life to the curb in your fuck arsenal. Be brave, make a fool of yourself, and shit the bed. Seriously, actually shit your bed. Guess what? You’ll have smelly sheets but you’ll still be alive. Care about family, friends, and doing things with purpose. Life gets so much more joyful and easy when you ease off the intensity of caring about trivial things all the time. In Mark’s Disney Channel language, “The problem with people who hand out fucks like ice cream at a goddamn summer camp is that they don’t have anything more fuckworthy to dedicate their fucks to”. This is true ya’ll. Are you spending your time and effort on the people and activities that deserve them? I promise if you do, people will spend more fucks on you too.
We as humans often criticise when we are hurting. So don’t take other people’s idiocy personally. Cause it’s really not about you. The person’s opinions aren’t the problem either, the problem is when you believe said opinions. So take what they are saying and find the truth in it and leave the rest behind. We are constantly comparing ourselves to everyone’s highlight reel on social media, but you guys….social media is NOT the real world. (Unless you’ve found the Matrix of Instagram, private message me please…it sounds fun and full of possible pranks). Let go of your hurt and pain from the past, only follow positive accounts, scroll through with mindfulness and non-judgement, and realize that we are giving way too many fucks about stupid shit all day everyday. You are better than that and deserve a little damn peace and quiet in this house!!!
Try it guys. Stop giving so many fucks. Give fucks about the quality fucks. And share the joy that not giving a fuck brings.
Sorry if your kid read this, Julia