Social Media Smackdown
You my friend just fell into the BEAR TRAP OF INTERVENTION!!! No Pokemon here PUT DOWN YOUR PHONE!!! Seriously, put it down. Hey! I said put……You know I can see you right?!?! Just kidding if I was that good of a hacker I would have taken over multiple countries by now with my sidekick Pinky. (He’s a rat but he’s such a loyal friend). So real talk, social media has many wonderful aspects that make our lives fucking cake, but the downsides are ripping through our generation and we are slowly seeing that everything in moderation could not be more true in this case. Ever lost an entire afternoon to something on the internet? Was it worth it?
BUT WHY IS IT BAD?!? POKEMONGO IS EVERYTHING!!!! (Gets slapped in the face) SNAP OUT OF IT!!!
- ADDICTION. Social media is addictive and if you think you lost your phone for two seconds as your fingers are craving to swipe down Instagram to kill some time, you should take a moment to dwell on that. When we get “likes” it stimulates the pleasure centers in your brain. Just like other addictive things, you copy?
- ATTENTION SPAN DECREASE. Switching from app to app totally fucks with your attention span. “WHAT? I totally got distracted”. The cobwebs show up when we aren’t in constant practice of mindfulness and many of the good habits we’ve learned eventually go right down the shitter. That means toilet you guys!!!
- DECLINE IN INTELLECTUAL ABILITIES. Most of the apps on our phones are like “chewing gum for the brain.” Unless you are only using your phone for TedTalks and NYTimes Crossword puzzles, then let’s be honest looking at Instagram is NOT an intellectual activity. I understand the need to destress, but are you really de-stressing as effectively as a moment of quiet would give you? What were the old timey people doing? Talking to others and reading and learning. BE MORE OLD TIMEY!!!!!
- STRESS AND FATIGUE. No one in the history of ever said “wow I always feel refreshed and invigorated from playing Candy Crush!” Swiping through things is exhausting because your brain and eyeballs need a freaking moment to catch their breath. They are processing lots of information and often “information” that is totally worthless. How much are your really taking in and remembering? Stop shoving media overload at your brain. Take in the world around you. Spread your arms and run through an open field damnit!
- EMOTIONAL DAMAGE. There are studies galore popping up on this but FOMO, seeing something upsetting, and comparisons can and WILL derail the great day you were having just two minutes ago. Insecurities pop up, anxiety about perfectionism, poor self-esteem, and even cyber bullying will drag you down to sad town. So cut it out! Anyone who thinks a french press coffee maker and cup of coffee on your bed is realistic has been sleeping on concrete because real beds spill cups of coffee!!!!!!! FOOLS!!!
I think the internet has given us so much. (Obviously porn!) But I strongly believe it is hindering us as much as it has made life simpler. We are taking the shortcuts and often that doesn’t pay off. Let your brain relax and track your time online. Go outside and spend more time with HUMANS. Check sites with purpose and only subscribe to things that will make you more AWESOME! Sign off at night and on the weekends and FUCKING LIVE. You guys, LIVE. Humans are hilarious. All you have to do is look past your screen.
Ironically writing this from a computer, Julia