Foam Rolling-Massage for da broke
Full disclosure, my fiance has been foam rolling for years and I’ve always secretly judged him as a fool. We would often go work out together and while I’d be killing my ass on the treadmill he’d be rolling his ass out on the floor. In my head I was like “ummmmmmm excuse me this is NOT what the gym is for biiiiiiiitch”. But I was years behind the times. It wasn’t until we moved in together (ok a year after jeeze I get really stubborn sometimes) that I tried it out and was like WHAT THE BLEEEEP THIS SHIT IS AMAZING I’VE NEVER FELT BETTER!!!!! So there you have it non-believers, it’s awesome.
WHAT is it you ask? First, climb out of the hole you’ve been living in. Now, next to that hole find a log. See the log? It looks like that but can range from soft to firm foam. (Guys the word log is for some reason HILARIOUS to me. Anyone agree? LOG. haha it’s too good). So down to the science. Self-myofascial release sounds dirty but it’s a fancy way of saying that you use a foam roller (or tennis ball but we all know those are for dogs) to release muscle tightness or trigger points aka knots. Sound like a massage? It’s the closest you can get and wherever you have muscle, you can roll baby!
WHY? Rolling with your homie muscles helps reestablish proper movement, helps soothe painful areas, assists in blood flow and circulation, flushes out toxins (mi favorita!), helps prevent injury, and aids in faster recovery. Sign me up right?!? The deep compression helps to break up your tight muscles leaving you relaxed and leaner. Imagine trying to stretch out a workout band with a knot in the middle, not super cute. That is why knots in your muscles can really put strain on the rest of your body.
HOW? Apply your body weight and start by rolling slowly with moderate pressure. I repeat ROLL SLOWLY (fast rolling does dick). It should feel like a deep tissue massage where you hit certain pressure points and breath into them but then move onto the next. When you come across a tight spot, relax into it for 5-30 seconds and then roll onward. If the pain is too much, start by rolling a few inches from the area and see if you can make it to the devil spot. Never should you feel intense pain but instead pressure and soreness but relief afterwards. (Drink yo water pls). Also, use your brains. No one can know how this feels except for you so trust your gut. No rolling over joints or bones either please and be wary of your old lady backs. (That includes the dudes). Your lower back should be left to child’s pose from ye olde yoga book and back rolling shouldn’t go past your lower ribcage. If lower back pain is your problem try rolling out your butt. It’s crazy how much tension is kept in there. Seriously. Everyone has butt tension. Butt. Tension. #BUTTTENSION
Rolling out before and after a workout is ideal if you’re reaching from the stars but if only choosing one, the experts agree pre-workout is best to get your muscles loose and blood flowing. So get out to your gym or amazon prime account and start rolling. I promise you will feel like a million bucks and sleep like a baby.
Rolling while writing, because it’s the new standing desk,
Julia
(It’s not don’t bring one to work)