Perfectionism is LAME
Remember Mary Poppins? What a complete TERROR. That movie should have been rated R for all of the graphic horror it showed. It’s true don’t question this. The only redeeming part is the dancing penguins. Those guys are a class act. Fo real guys, anyone else exhausted from the pursuit of perfection? How often do you read an article about how to get the perfect hair, to choose the perfect houseplant, to plan the perfect dinner party….when does this hamster wheel from hell end?!?!? It’s like you’re a horse and they keep dangling a carrot in front of you to pull the carriage and you somehow never get closer. Except in reality you’re a human, not a horse, and you have the ability to reason and think logically and suddenly this whole carrot thing is starting to look like a PONZI SCHEME!!! Except the ponzi scheme joke is actually being run by yourself on you!!!! The joke is from you to YOU. Hahahahaha you idiot! You fell for your own mind tricks again!!!
I have news for you peeps. Perfection can NEVER be obtained. It’s like saying “I’m going to go find the fountain of youth!” (Fun fact: It’s in Tallahassee, Florida. I found it. I drank from it. I’m actually 109 years old). Remember the game Perfection from Milton Bradley? If you don’t, it was a game in which you had a timer that would tick down to a terrifying ring while you tried to put little puzzle pieces into a gyrating board. Talk about stressful. Worst game ever. Seeing a trend? Perfectionism kills joy. Now this is not a piece about losing attention to detail, but rather to end the pursuit of an unattainable goal.
No one is capable of having control of their lives 100% of the time. Even the robots shit the bed from time to time. (It’s no big deal I have an insider at IBM. I will notify you all when the robot apocalypse is coming. For now the robots are still shitting the bed sometimes). Worrying about perfection means you may never start something out of fear. Perfectionism is often a shield people use against trying new things and making mistakes. Do you know what we wouldn’t have if people were perfect? BLOOPER REELS. And guess what? Everyone is laughing. No one is watching the blooper reels going, “oh they messed up what a LOSER!!!” Also, HEALTH ALERT, perfectionists are shown to have higher stress levels and a greater risk for depression. It’s no wonder with all that intense effort it would eventually take a toll on not only you but your relationships. Perfectionism paralyses those in its grasp and stops you from focusing on the things that really matter. Not really worth it anymore right?
SO WHAT’S A GIRL TO DO?!?!? In Silicon Valley a popular saying is “FAIL FAST”. And when you think about it it makes perfect sense. The faster you fail, the quicker you learn. And who here is anti-learning? Hopefully no one. Plus, we forget that being different is DA BOMB. Be a badass who loves their traits and flaws because it’s what makes you UNIQUE. Be present with people instead of worrying about how you appear to them. (They will appreciate that you are truly listening to them and will then be more likely to help you or join your team. A little secret from my upcoming book called, How To Win Friends and Influence Idiots). Being NOT perfect is all about finding what works for you. For example, I don’t own a brush. Every guy I have ever dated has seen this void and tried to fill it by surprising me with a…..best gift ever…..BRUSH!! But I throw them out. I comb my wet hair with my fingers in the shower and that’s how I choose to LIVE FABULOUSLY. Haters gonna hate ya feel? And the point is no one on the street would point and say “that monster didn’t brush her hair!!!!!” My hair looks fly on the reg. So be the best YOU and not the best someone else. Make the process the goal. Perfectionism is tiring and you my friend, are better than perfect.
Also don’t own a comb, Julia